IMOL GOES "INTERNATIONAL"

Okay so I had promised that I would incorporate more things international into this blog, so I thought long and hard about what I could do while I wait for the government to do its job and issue me a new passport already, and I decided to go find the tourists. No better place to do that in San Francisco than Fisherman's Wharf and Alcatraz Island.

MoFo's mother was in town, too, so it seemed like a perfect excuse to do something I normally wouldn't do. In fact, although I've lived in the Bay Area since '94 (minus 3 years in New Orleans), I have never been to Alcatraz nor had I ever ridden a cable car. Just one of those things I felt too cool to do as a local and all.

What a mistake. The audio tour of Alcatraz is stellar. The best I have ever heard (okay so it's the only audio tour I've ever taken but it was still pretty cool). Very educational, too. There were some things about the history of the island that I'd had no idea about. For instance, did you know Al Capone liked to wear his underwear over his head and cluck like a chicken? Actually, that might not be true - I just like to start random rumors in public places to see if they ever come back my way (the one about pop rocks, coke and Mikey from Life cereal - I started that one when I was in grammar school).

The sea lion guy at Fisherman's Wharf was cool to talk to. He's there to answer questions about the sea lions that like to sunbathe at the pier. I stumped him. I asked him if the sea lions' mating habits are more affected by diet or temperature changes. He had no answer for me (little did he know it was a trick question!). We also talked about sharks. The Great Whites off the coast* like to munch on these poor creatures. Sea Lion Guy said that the Killer Whales, though, who hunt in packs, kick ass over the Great Whites. Thus endeth the marine life lesson for the day.

Finally, when darkness fell, I wrapped my arm around a cable car pole and went on what felt like a roller coaster ride through the streets of San Francisco. Thank God I had the wherewithall for an Irish Coffee from Buena Vista before flying through the chilly city air.

FYI - If any of my friends want to come visit (nudge nudge), I'll gladly do it all again.

*The fall is a great time to visit the Farallon Islands off the coast of the San Francisco peninsula because those waters are known as the mating waters for all types of sharks (including Great Whites) and whales (including Orcas). It's basically a big orgy (my words - Sea Lion Guy would call it a great photo opportunity).